Monday, October 26, 2009

Focus vs Multitask

Shh!! Do not disturb!

Have you always wanted to get his attention, only to find that he is not attentive at all? The majority of men, when performing a task, tend to be more focused at the task at hand. Think of it, when the prehistoric men were out hunting in a group, the men would require great concentration while aiming their spears in the eyes of the sabretooth cat! Meow! Just look at all the professions we have today, brain surgeons, electronic engineers, accountants… all these roles are really specific and they require the person to focus. Imagine tasking a brain surgeon with plumbing. Not a good idea. Similarly, expecting a guy to email you, write letters, give you a present, pick you up for dinner etc all together coupled with his already hectic life and you will only get heart ache.

Surprisingly, women have adapted to multitasking, performing various tasks together and they have the mental capacity to actually do it. Research shows that women of all ancient civilizations hold the responsibility of home maker, nurse, teacher, grocer, cook and many more. (I guess = MUM) Give a woman a list of five things to do, and you can expect the bottom four things to be completed if they can be multitasked. She will say, “Oh, I could iron while I am waiting for the soup to cook”. A man on the other hand will probably start from the top. If the task requires focus, it won’t be surprising if he returns with only the first task crossed off. He will put all his effort into getting the most important thing done and may even get engrossed in it.

So guys: When your girl needs your attention (and she will need it a lot), give her some quality time where you can focus on her needs and only her. Turn off the games or your favorite channel if you owe her a dose of attention. Attention to her is like a leaky bucket and must be filled consistently!

Ladies: If you desperately want a guy’s undivided attention, make sure that there are no distractions which might make his mind wander off. Also, understand the need for him to focus and do not over load his system. If there are many things you want, split them into manageable portions. When he is engrossed in something, do not spoil his focus as it will ruin his concentration and he will most likely blame it on you, whether he says it out loud or not. Instead, ask him first if he has time for you, or ask him for some of his time by telling him you really need it.

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